Home.

*Sighs* Here I go again. I must confess that after my boyfriend came to visit me at Mexico, I didn’t see myself jumping in a plane 3 days after and out of nowhere to meet him at Holland the very next day. But I’m really happy I did. Now I’m back at home, after another 3 wonderful weeks, and I must say I’m brokenhearted.

During the time I stayed there, my suspicions were asured. I felt like even though I was 10,000 km away from my apartment, I was finally home. I feel I’ve met him my whole life, I really do. Being with him really feels like being in the place I belong to, it does feel like home. And thus, being an ocean apart is like being away from home, it also makes me homesick.

Something in your eyes, makes me wanna lose myself
Makes me wanna lose myself, in your arms
There’s something in your voice, makes my heart beat fast
Hope this feeling lasts, the rest of my life
If you knew how lonely my life has been
And how long I’ve been so alone
And if you knew how I wanted someone to come along
And change my life the way you’ve done
It feels like home to me, it feels like home to me
It feels like I’m all the way back where I come from
It feels like home to me, it feels like home to me
It feels like I’m all the way back where I belong
Well, if you knew how much this moment means to me
And how long I’ve waited for your touch
And if you knew how happy you are making me
I never thought that I’d love anyone so much
It feels like home to me, it feels like home to me
It feels like I’m all the way the back where I come from
It feels like home to me, it feels like home to me
It feels like I’m all the way back where I belong
It feels like I’m all the way back where I belong

February 14th has gone by, and I feel like I might go insane. Getting back to where I want to be is not easy and won’t be quick. My better half is missing and my bed feels cold and empty. Some more art, for the hurt soul…

What’s next? Well, i can tell you that it’s not lack of love what hasn’t brought us together, but excess of rules. It is not easy to move in together, requires time, money we don’t have, language learning and following lots of goverment regulations. There’s been wonderful people that has tried to help us and we are really thankful for those souls. Why is it so difficult to go and be with the one we love? Why do they make it so hard for us? We do not know. But we do hope we can sort things out before we both go insane. You know? It is not easy to find the one, especially if that person lives across the Atlantic. It is also very hard to live like this.

I lie awake at night
See things in black and white
I’ve only got you inside my mind
You know you have made me blind
I lie awake and pray
That we will find a way
I have all this longing in my heart
I knew it right from the start
Oh my pretty pretty boy I love you
Like I never ever loved no one before you
Pretty pretty boy of mine
Just tell me you love me too
Oh my pretty pretty boy I need you
Oh my pretty pretty boy I do
Let me inside, make me stay right beside you
I used to write your name
And put it in a frame
And sometime I think I hear you call
Right from my bedroom wal
You stay a little while
And touch me with your smile
And what can I say to make it happen
To reach out for you in time
Oh my pretty pretty boy I love you
Like I never ever loved no one before you
Pretty pretty boy of mine
Just tell me you love me too
Oh my pretty pretty boy I need you
Oh my pretty pretty boy I do
Let me inside, make me stay right beside you

Sometimes I crack and I can’t help when depression takes over. But I am fighting for what I want: the man of my dreams, the love of my life. I wish there could be an easier way, but there isn’t. And the thing is that it’s already hard to breathe, it hurts.

Do you want to help? You can. We’re starting this “saving box” [sort to speak]. In which anyone interested in helping this love story could actually help. This basically consists on donating money to our paypal account. It doesn’t have no be much as for one cent you can donate is one more cent we don’t have, a cent we could use, and a cent we will be very grateful for.

“A love like that deserves a break”

-A friend.

~ by Phoebz on February 22, 2009.